Meetings

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, which word would be "meetings."

The same

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
- Nikita Khrushchev, Russian Soviet politician

Research

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

Too keep up

There are days when it takes all you've got to keep up with the losers.

Only Human

To err is human, to blame it on someone else is more human.

Arguing with an idiot

When you are arguing with an idiot, make sure the other person isn't doing the same thing.

Monkey

The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of his behind.

The written word

The discipline of the written word punishes both stupidity and dishonesty.

Illusion

Many people live under the illusion that they have none.
 

Interrupted

Those who say it can't be done are usually interrupted by others doing it.

An insult

This guy told me he thought I was attractive, and when I get a nice compliment I like to take it in, swish it around in my brain... until it becomes an insult.

- Sheila Wenz

To learn about money

The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.

- Katharine Whitehorn 

The basic things

 If leaders are careless about basic things - telling the truth, respecting moral codes, proper professional conduct - who can believe them on other issues?"
- James L. Hayes

Sexual quotes-More interesting

An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex.
- Aldous Huxley

Thought for the day-Good advice

Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Political quotes-Right to be represented

"In democracy everyone has the right to be represented, even the jerks."
- Chris Patten, Former UK MP and Governor of Hong Kong.

Famous people quotes-Live next door

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.
- Katherine Hepburn

Sarcastic jokes-Military secrets

An intelligence officer with the Canadian armed forces has been arrested for passing Canadian military secrets to a terrorist group. I don't know what's more shocking, the fact that he did that or that Canada has military secrets.
- Jay Leno

Sarcastic quotes-Diplomacy

"In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known."
- Thomas Pickering

Humor quotes-Easier

"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."
- Andy Rooney